Birthday Woes

I recently turned 18, and typical of my teen birthdays, many things went horribly horribly awry. First, I dropped my [brand new, spotless, flamingo red] phone shortly after parking at the pool, and it clattered on the asphalt beneath my car, which broke my heart to watch. Even at 18, I'm still attached to material things.

Afterwards, I wasn't feeling too hot (actually, very much hot. Like, not in the good way) so we went home, and in an effort to walk it off (in the blistering heat I wasn't used to) with Derek, who was being very, very patient with my drama-queen attitude, I began to feel nauseous and ended up throwing up my birthday Icee all over the sidewalk. (Which must've been super attractive.) In an attempt to walk home, I kept getting dizzy and had to lay down on the dirty concrete every few steps. A couple people driving by asked if I needed a cell phone/ambulance/help and we politely explained we lived close by and were alright. So they drove away saying "Wow that scared the [bleep] outta me. I thought she was dead!"

With Derek half carrying-half dragging me (with many breaks on the way), we finally made it home. Where I then slept for about four hours while Derek was stuck watching Friends reruns. But I felt much better after my extended-birthday nap, whoo.

Let's take a look back at all of my past birthday unpleasantries (and some humorous situations):
17th: I had the great idea of hanging out with a person from my past who made me buy him a burger, and proceeded to make me cry. Shame on me.

16th: Camp meeting, all day (and night). Ohh midsummer birthdays.

15th: Actually, quite alright. I do recall a butterfly attacking me. Got it all on my new camcorder.

14th: My last Maryland birthday. Had a garage sale to sell all the crap that accumulates when you stay in one place too long, which really upset me because I'm attached to material things (and may have a bit of a hoarding problem). The waiters sang to me at TGI Fridays for dinner as I was coloring on the kids menu. Ohh to be fourteen.

I feel like this is all birthday karma from my toddler days when I'd run around in my underwear and obsess over my presents. However, I've learned over the years many valuable things: drink lots of water (instead of Icee), don't hang out with mega-tool-burger-pigs, don't sign up for camp stuff that conflicts with your special day, figure out how to get rid of all the butterflies in the world, and don't do potentially embarrassing things at a restaurant where your birthday dinner is being held.

On a happier note, I still got my family birthday dinner this weekend, and will get a birthday-date dinner this week from a very, very patient boy who didn't run away as I puked on his shoes. He also got me birthday blingage. I win.